Girl Talk
by StoriesOfANobody
Summary: After a sudden break-up with Corey, Laney gets into a funk. Who better to talk some sense into her than her old enemy/new friend/relationship expert Carrie?


"How're you feeling?" Carrie asked when the front door swung open revealing a very upset looking red head.

"I hate him," Laney declared bitterly, rubbing her tearstained eyes.

"Oh, you don't hate him, Laney. You're just saying that."

"I am not, Carrie. I truly hate him." The other girl gave a glance of pure disbelieve. Laney scowled.

"Don't look at me like that; it's the truth…partly. Ugh, why did you have to drag me out of my self-loathing session just to make me more miserable?"

"Because that's what best friends do?" Carrie supplied with a grin.

"We aren't best friends, Carrie," Laney put it bluntly.

"I brought ice cream." She pulled the Newman vocalist inside so fast that she nearly fell over.

"What do you want, best friend?"

"I want to talk about your break up with Corey," Carrie said after a deep inhale. She sat down on the couch as Laney opened the ice cream, frowning and smiling at the same time.

"Why?"  
"Because I don't understand men." Laney swallowed her mouth of chocolate dairy product and peered at her friend. Newly appointed friend or not, sarcasm was her signature move.

"I heard sarcasm in there. That's my thing."

"You sound like Lenny," Carrie mused. "And yes, that was sarcasm."

Laney glowered half-heartedly.

"Anyway, what's with the break up? I thought you and Corey were absolutely perfect for each other." Laney snorted at that comment.

"We're about as perfect together as oil and water. Don't say his name, by the way," She threatened lightly. Carrie held up her hands in mock defense, but she wasn't intimidated by the post break-up, emotional teenager.

"So…you didn't get along?"

"No, Carrie, we didn't get along," Laney snapped. Then her features softened. "I thought we were doing fine until he started yelling I cheated on him."

"Did you?" Carrie inquired incredulously.

"NO!" She threw her hands up again, leaning back. That response startled her a little bit.

"Well, sorry. How'd he get that idea then?"

"I don't know," Laney said, oddly calm.

"Think hard, Laney. You didn't see any other boys without him knowing?" prompted Carrie. The basset squeezed her eyes shut in concentration, and then shook her head slowly.  
"No- wait, I ran into Lenny a couple hours before he accused me."  
"You and Lenny?" The blue haired gaped. Laney gave a dismissive wave.

"Oh, don't even go there. Lenny's like a brother to me."

"He better be," Carrie muttered darkly. Laney glanced up, surprised by the sudden shift in attitude.

"Sorry, protective girlfriend instinct," the girl smiled sheepishly.

"Girlfriend? No way, you're going out with Lenny!" Laney yelled giddily.

"Um…no…"

"Carrie, under best friend code 14, I demand you tell me the truth."

"Well played, Penn," Carrie said, eyes narrowed in playful suspicion. Laney waited impatiently for the answer until the other female sighed. "Fine, we started dating last month."

"Oh, my god! Why didn't you tell me?"

"We weren't friends until five minutes ago."

"You have a point, Beff. Or should I say Nepp?" Laney teased her.

"Shut up, Laney," she demanded, blushing furiously.

"No can do, _Carrie_," the red head mocked her tone. Then, with a sly grin, sung, "Lenny and Carrie sitting in a tree, K-i-s-s-"

"Finish that and you will taste your lunch again," Carrie growled.

"Yikes, a bit touchy, are we?" Laney smirked. Her companion desperately tried to change the subject.

"How did we start talking about me and Lenny? We're supposed to be discussing your break-up."

"We finished talking about that," Laney said monotonously while waving a hand. Carrie raised her brow at the gesture and smiled.

"Your Jedi mind tricks don't work on me."

"Damn it."

"Anyway, when are you going to apologize?" The guitarist asked.

"Uh, never! He over reacted."

"He did not, Laney. He's a guy who saw his girlfriend with another dude."

"It was Lenny!" Laney cried in frustration.

"Offensive, Penn," Carrie huffed.

"Sorry. I love Core, and, as I have said, Lenny's like my brother."

"I get it. Unfortunately, Riffin does not." Both girls sighed.

"Ugh, boys," Laney complained, staring down into the tub of melting cream.

"I know, right? Pass the ice cream."

"No."

"Please?" Carrie insisted.

"No. My ice cream."

"I bought it!"

"I ate it all," Laney lied.

"Dudette, I still see some in there."

"No, you don't." Carrie glowered.

"Glare all you want, I have the ice cream." If looks could kill, Laney would be dead.

"Okay, now you're creeping me out." The glaring went on.

"Carrie?" Still looking like a cat scratched the wrong way, said girl held out her hand.

"Ah, just take the ice cream!" Laney relented. Her friend suddenly had a shift in behavior and grinned.

"The Beff glare. It works every time."

"I pity Lenny," Laney laughed. Carrie shrugged, not bothering to look up or fully pay attention.

"He gives me the puppy eyes a lot so it's fair."

"Oh, so one could say you melt when he gives you the puppy eyes?" Laney continued.

"Shut. Up. Penn."

"Hmm…No."

Carrie swung her open palm towards her acquaintance, swatting her shoulder.

"Ouch! You hit me!" the red head yelped.

"No duh, Sherlock. I told you to shut up."

"That's not polite, but okay."

"You know I'm going to tease you and Riffin now, right?" Carrie said after a pause.

"You wouldn't!"

"Try me."

"I don't think I will," Laney decided wisely.

"Chicken…" the other snickered.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, 'Chicken.' You know, as in deliciously unhealthy meal or coward."

"You did not just call Laney Penn a coward."

"I guess you aren't her then."

"Oh, it is on, Beff," Laney stated as she rolled up her sleeves.

"Bring it, Penn," Carrie shot back, adjusting her beanie. They locked hands and glared at each other.

"One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war. Go!" The girls recited together.

A few intense thumb wrestling moments later, the Newman cheered.

"Yes, I win!"

"Correction, you cheated," the Grojbandian grumbled.

"I won."

"You cheated."

"Won!"

"Cheated!"

"Won!

"Cheated!"

"At least I have a boyfriend!" Carrie shouted. She instantly regretted it as she saw Laney sink into the couch.  
"Sorry, that was a low blow, Laney."

"It's fine, really. It's in the past."

"Don't go all Lion King on me," Carrie ribbed. "And I am sorry."

"Forgiven, Beff. Consider it water under the Peaceville Bridge."

"We don't have a bridge in Peaceville," She said thoughtfully.

"It was a figure of speech," Laney explained, standing and grabbing her coat.

"Oh. Where're you going?"

"To explain our misunderstanding and get an apology out of my idiot," the girl replied casually.

"You mean Riffin?"

"Duh."

"Can I come with?" Carrie questioned excitedly. Laney smiled mischievously, making the Newman frown slightly.

"Sure, if you want to see an apology make out."

"Yuck, never mind. I'll stay here with the ice cream," Carrie declined, visibly disgusted.

"You are not staying in my house," the bass player objected.

"Try to make me leave, Penn."

"Hey, I see Lenny down the street!"

"Really? Where?" Carrie inspected the sidewalk both ways and scowled back at her peer, who just finished locking the front door. "You fooled me."

"Jeez, I would've never guessed."

"You're good at that. The sarcasm, I mean."

"Told you it was my thing."


End file.
